 | Stuff Lesbians Like Part 115: Stating something is “So Lesbian” as if they are above it while loving something equally lesbian.By Grace Abounding |
We all know that dyke who acts as if they are above living as a walking lesbian cliché. They refuse to wear anything from American Eagle, abhor Tivas and wouldn’t be caught dead sporting a faux hawk. They are quite verbal about how they can’t stand these things and how lesbians can do so much better when it comes to fashion. They work very hard to enlighten their poor, uneducated gay posse all while sporting a plaid shirt, converse shoes and aviator glasses. As someone who is so quick to criticize certain clothing as “SO lesbian” as if it is a bad thing (personally I think there is nothing wrong with having some key fashion items to help point us out to each other from a distance) they commit an equal number of fashion sins and make shopping nearly impossible for the company they keep. Anything you are mildly interested in trying on or (gasp!) purchasing is shot down by their negative comment, snide remark, or dirty look.
The only time shopping with them is tolerable and acceptable is when you are accompanying them on a shopping trip for themselves. This is where you love having them as part of your entourage and forgive all of their annoying ways. This person is completely clueless as to how hilarious they are, providing hours of entertainment among your mutual friends to make up for disastrous shopping trips where you just go back later without them and buy the wrist cuff you were eyeing. If you’ve ever accompanied them on a trip to buy new sneakers it goes something like this: The automatic doors opening is the starting buzzer in a one-person competition to find the dykiest looking shoes. They race over, pick them up and state in a condescending tone, “These shoes are SO lesbian.” This sentence is almost instantly followed by, “Ooo, check those sneakers out. They are really cute!” Nope. Not gay at all my friend, not gay at all.
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August 4th, 2009 at 2:24 pm
As a boi I MUST point out the photo in Part 115…those shoes are TOTALLY different! I’ve had an affair with sneakers ever since I could lace them myself.
And I can tell you that those Nikes are WAY cooler than those Tiva sandals. The Nikes you can dress up or down, the Tiva should only be wore while on a white water rafting trip — no really, not even to the BEACH!
I totally get that some lesbians/queers/bois/femmes like to play fashion police or overlook their own gayness when it comes to getting dressed. I love how we all attempt to dress differently/individually and then show up to the club and everyone is wearing a variation of someone else’s outfit — come on, you know it’s happened.
August 4th, 2009 at 2:59 pm
The sandals are Keens, not Tevas. Actually Keens are no longer just for amphibious pursuits. They now make Keens with those clicky clicky things in the bottoms so that you can click into your bike pedals. I’ve seen them – I don’t OWN them of course.
August 16th, 2009 at 11:34 pm
I say there is a definite difference between the Keens and the other sneaks. Keens are “so lesbian” but most things “so lesbian” are also very practical, and thus, I do own those keens. In a darker blue though. REI didn’t have that color when I was there.
April 9th, 2010 at 10:23 am
I’ve been queer since I was a kid. In high school my queer girlfriends and I would shop thrift stores for outrageous outfits. In the Early 90, wearing gaudy thrift store clothes was subversive. DeeLight was hip and the queer clubs full of freaks who would embrace you as one of their own. Now this subculture has taken on too much chauvinism from the mainstream. Dressing like a flamboyant femme is only acceptable for cross-dressers. I get sneers from queers for dressing feminine. Femmes in Oregon are not being acknowledged as being queer. Please stop segregating the lesbian scene. We all like different flavors of women. Stop acting so conservative, and pressing your style on others. We need to come together and accept that there are some queers that are non-conformist, creative or enjoy expressing themselves; isn’t that what makes the world interesting?