 | Fortune Cookie Fortunes for LesbiansBy Grace Yip |
The difference between someone being “single” and “available” is “trouble.”
“Is she or isn’t she?” She is.
You will be successful in getting her number.
If you feel sick later, it was the tofu.
Let it go. It will save you $$ on therapy.
Keep pushing… you are making this world a better place.
Don’t be stupid: Put down the Mai Tai… and your phone.
The menu said vegan, but SURPRISE! It was cooked with fish sauce.
Fish sauce will not kill you.
Shy girls are like flowers. Nurture them and they’ll open up.
Some girls are like goldfish. Nurture them but your relationship will nevertheless die quickly.
Goldfish are pretty.
Do not be distracted by the pretty lights.
Your quick thinking will get you out of a sticky ex-tuation.
“That” ex will soon find you on Facebook. Ignore request.
Say what’s on your mind. After all, honesty is the best policy. Unless you are in the US military.
“Crazy” is relative.
You will soon be surrounded by friends and laughter at the karaoke bar.
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September 30th, 2009 at 8:46 am
Why have I never had these fortunes?!
September 30th, 2009 at 11:59 am
I just read about Grace Law’s fish and laughed so hard I cried. Who knew dead fish could be so funny?
September 30th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
*cracks open fortune cookie*
You think you sported the fashion mullet, aviatar shades and checked shirts “before they became cool”, but you are sadly mistaken.
October 1st, 2009 at 9:32 pm
You should really publish these and create a product. Can I steal them if you don’t?
October 2nd, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Dude, the wheels are already in motion. Coming soon to a lezzie chinese food take out near you.