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Grace Yip

Stuff Lesbians Like Part 18: Being cheap to fund their food habits

By

Lezzies are often known for being cheap. We will shop in bulk, pirate someone else’s wifi and reuse Ziploc bags (under the guise of “recycling” but dude, we’re just being cheap). We are proud of our abilities to dumpster dive and will make you marvel at the fact that our couches were hauled 10 blocks to our apartments on our backs. We like scrounging the thrift stores for vintage clothes (that makes us look so glamorously “hipster”), but will make a run to Target when new clothes are in order.

We will find every single possible way to save… just to blow it all on great food.

Lezzies are foodies. We know of every single spot in the city for the best <insert ethnic food here>, can rattle off the types and brands of wine that would go with a pistachio encrusted halibut, and will not think twice about throwing half a paycheck away at a nice hunk of stinky brie from some obscure small town in rural France. We have no wallet fear when booking a table at some high end eatery downtown just so we can try it out. $20 for a bite sized amuse bouche? Gimme!! That place down the block serves fugu??? We are not afraid of death – let’s go!!

Chowhound is our bible. Don’t bother showing us a Zagat’s – it’s blasphemy. Our dedication to food is unrelenting. We’ll travel over two hours by foot/bike/train/car/plane just to stock up on rare goodies at a specialty grocer. When on vacation, not only do we plan out usual vacation-y activities, we’ve planned the restos to hit for every breakfast/lunch/dinner/snack. If we like your city, we’ll come back for more, especially if you have the bestest plantain sandwiches EVAR or the perfect yummy dim sum…

Yes, we’re cheap. We’re not always the best tippers but please understand.. we’ll need the $5 to spend that old fashioned, 100000% butterfat ice cream “shoppe” after dinner.

Until next time… ::::BURP::::

18 Responses to “Stuff Lesbians Like Part 18: Being cheap to fund their food habits”

  1. lulazoid Says:

    ROFL. OK, I do most definitely plead guilty to this one. Drove 40 minutes yesterday to an organic farm for vegetables, meat and above all, farm-fresh raw milk. I cook therefore I exist?

  2. Cat_D Says:

    Funny, I’ve always attributed being cheap and being an adventurous foodie to being Asian, but never to being lesbian.

  3. Grace Chu Says:

    @ Cat_D: Then Rosen must be Asian then. Yip doesn’t even know Rosen, but she just wrote an entire post about her, LOL! Rosen will shop at Kohl’s blowout sales for clothes and then go to Babbo and Buddakan on a whim.

  4. fannie Says:

    Mmmm, thanks for the heads-up on those plantain sandwiches! (And they’re pretty cheap too)

  5. Grace Chu Says:

    Oops, one more thing. This was my experience running with an Asian crowd in college:

    Prada Prada Prada. Why aren’t you wearing Prada? Tiffany. Gucci. Prada. Prada Prada Prada. Jesus Christ is the Lord. Moschino. Prada. Prada. Prada. Oh my god, I can’t believe you’re still wearing CK!!! Let’s get you some Energie jeans – or at least Diesel. *sniff* *head toss* Dance dance, club club. Um, like… did she seriously wear white after Labor Day? Uh mah gah! D&G. Prada Prada Prada. BMW. Prada Prada. Oh, and sushi.

    Needless to say, sometimes I felt a leeeeetle out of place.

  6. Grace Yip Says:

    RE: Asians being cheap and being adventurous. Asian cheap is a little bit different than Lezzie cheap.

    Yes, us asian are adventurous eaters – but at some point after college (perhaps in grad school or when we are working for McKinsey Morgan Sachs), it will dawn on us that paying $200 for a meal is redunkulous. Also, straight asians will also at this point decide to pop out babies, in which the focus will be SAVE SAVE SAVE SAVE SO MY BABY CAN TAKE PIANO LESSONS —> PRIVATE SCHOOLING —-> EVERY SAT PREP COURSE POSSIBLE —-> IVY-LEAGUE COLLEGE just so they can “step it” to Mrs. Chang who lives down the street who keeps reminding everyone her kid is a violin prodigy (Joy Luck Club, anyone?)

    In my family, we ate a lot of weird shit at home (hella adventurous) but somehow my mom was able to acquire a collection of Gucci while sending me to private school all my life. They saved by not going out to eat, no cable TV and hanging clothes out to dry in the yard to save on utils.

    Lezzies are all shades of cheap but the difference is not thinking twice about blowing the saved $$ on a meal (i.e. Rosen. hahahaaa)

  7. Grace Chu Says:

    Recap:

    AZN CHEAP: Asians will forgo the fancy restaurants, turn down the heat during winter and eat pickled vegetables from a can with rice so they can buy Prada. Okay, Prada was big the 90s – now it’s Louis Vuitton.

    LEZZIE CHEAP: Lezzies will forgo the Prada, Louis Vuitton, etc. and shop at Kohl’s, Target, or if they want to go to the mall, Aeropostale so they can blow $300 on a meal or purchase a vat of heirloom tomatoes at $10 a pound.

    End of lesson.

  8. Orange Says:

    Straddling both AZN & LEZ worlds, my 2 cents …

    AZN is all about “good deal” and less about the absolute amount of $. We (my Asian self) will jump through hoops (or infiltrate our Asian Mafia chain) to get something less than what they would normally cost (or better yet what EVERYONE ELSE would have to pay). Old things are only acceptable if they come from our friends who keep them in near-new condition for years (such as cars that they only drive between house & grocery store because everywhere else would be too far, or dining table set that never get used because people may dirty the table) and are selling to us at “way lower than market” price they would have sold to other friends just because we’re better friends. (Refer to Asian Mafia mention.) We will do that for vegetables that cost $0.99/lb, or furniture set that costs $5000.

    LEZ is all about “free” or “near-free” – wanna-be freegans. It doesn’t matter if a couch is all broken & have bed bugs, but if it’s for free, they (since I actually have longer affiliation with my AZN self so I have to pick sides in this case) will summon up their Lessie Mafia network & haul it across the city (with their bikes or borrowed car from friends preferably, but also public transportation using a pass that they found while walking home). They don’t care as much that nobody else want the piece of junk. Actually it is a bragging point if nobody else want whatever they pick – this means they have an artistic instinct to pick something that other people have missed but looks GREAT in their living room.

    Now back to reading my chowhound RSS …

  9. mouse Says:

    Or no you do not start a new stereotype about lesbians that we are bad tippers!!! Not only is it not true, it is about the worst thing you can say about any minority group, condemning their members to an endless cycle of getting shitty service in restraurants because the server knows they wont tip anyway, then of course having to decide whether to give a good tip for shitty service in order to try to break the stereotype! Do not start this rumour!
    And if you do tip badly on occasion to save money for something else, then you shouldn’t be going out to eat on that particular day. The tip is part of the cost–not an option. This aint France!

  10. Grace Rosen Says:

    It is awfully eerie how much Yip’s blog resembles my life. Although thrift stores are not my thing … the fact of wearing stranger’s clothing … yuck! Kohl’s … love it! I am not a fan of clothes shopping. However, I’m not sure it’s because I’m not willing to spend the money, I think it stems from my fear of trying on my “usual” size and not fitting into it. Besides, I have that last 20 lbs to loose … why spend lots of money if you are planning to loose weight?!

    I was always raised a foodie so although my interest may align with Lessie stereotypes … I blame my fondness of fine food from my mother.

    All of the comments remind of the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Remember watching that movie? Greek or not, everyone could relate … same thing here!

  11. Grace Yip Says:

    Mouse – I take it you don’t earn the average $32,000 per year for a US female. Or that you are slaving away at a dysfunctional non-profit or high risk school or trying to break out of being an adjunct while still trying to kick it with your friends who got econ/law/med degrees instead of an advanced english degree.

    lezzies, ethnic groups whatever. Tipping “trends” or “stereotypes” (nonmenclature whatevs) exist, baby.

    As an on-again/off-again bartender, i just wanna say i love the gay boys. i know that wad of singles is for the “wet jock-strap” contest later, but thanks for dropping a few in my tip jar. mama loves you… *smooch*

  12. Grace Yip Says:

    NOTE – i meant econ/med/law peeps who are not drowning in debt. man i left out a biggie there. ;P

  13. Grace Chu Says:

    Um, med/law/econ degree bitches can be poor too!!! It’s called residency/(“small firm” or “Legal Aid”)/Bear Stearns!!!!

  14. lulazoid Says:

    the gf worked in P-Town as a waitress for some time (she lived in the next village, what do you expect?) and she still claims to this day that lesbians are the worst tippers ever. One group once left her 50 cents, after she had basically run up and down the bar all night.
    So mouse, I don’t know what planet you live on, but it is especially true of the lesbians who visit P-Town ;-)

  15. Mouse Says:

    Yip-
    $32,000!!!! That must not include all those hardworking waitresses out there because that would bring the average for the ladies down to about $15,000 a year. You looking at this from only your own POV–you say, “I can’t afford to leave a decent tip.” But what makes you think the server can afford to work for you for NOTHING?

  16. Grace Chu Says:

    This topic will become moot in about three or four months when the dollar is worthless.

  17. Grace Yip Says:

    Put yer reading glasses on mousey, I said “we’re not always the best tippers” not we never leave a tip/decent tip/awesome tip. I don’t remember seeing an asterisk indicating the exclusion of waitresses in that US data. But I could be wrong – we are talking about US data here.

    Of course this is from my POV. I’m just tellin’ it like it is from the perspective of having been in the bar and restautant business for over 20+ years. (Yes, 20+. Child labor laws do not apply to chinese families.)

    The End.

  18. douchebag arena Says:

    it all makes so much sense now.
    me and my girlfriend eat all the time.
    i see happy lesbian couples gain 50 lbs like it’s nothin.
    OMG.

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